How to have minty-fresh eyeballs

Want your eyeballs feeling fresh and minty? Here's how:

First take a shower. Upon finishing your shower, remember that you didn't floss your teeth before the shower. Floss your teeth. Then, without washing your hands, put your contacts in. Scream with minty-fresh pain when your eyeballs burn with minty-freshness.

Comments

Karie said…
Owww! You won't forget to wash your hands ever again. In theory. :D
November 15, 2008 at 10:09 AM
Jenni said…
Nothing like minty fresh eyes!
November 15, 2008 at 10:13 AM
Nunya (as in; None ya Goddamn business) said…
Sara, it is also fun to experiment with other things such as habanero and serrano peppers. Give it a whirl and let me know how it goes. The excruciating burning only lasts for about 5 minutes, after that it's kindof a calming warmth.
November 15, 2008 at 10:34 AM
Shoebox Princess said…
Karie--yeah, in theory. I'll probably do it again next week.

Dave--right. If my eyeballs are ever cold, I might consider it for maybe half a nanosecond.
November 15, 2008 at 11:17 AM
TaterBean said…
oh...i've rubbed my eyes after eating taquitoes and jalopeno salsa...that was pleasant...
November 15, 2008 at 12:16 PM
Jen said…
Yes, I've done that before, too. Sadly, it's happened on more than one occasion though because I hate to not see until right before bed.
November 15, 2008 at 7:47 PM
Jenni said…
Last night, I found out that putting Carmex on your lips and then cleaning out the goopy makeup in your eye crotch gives that same minty freshness!!
November 16, 2008 at 6:13 AM
Shoebox Princess said…
Oh, yeah, Jenni, Carmex would so totally burn.
November 16, 2008 at 9:13 AM
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